If I Only Had a Chance
by ferio
Summary: A romance fic where Seph eventually must choose between love and jenova. Next chap contains a battle. AN Aeriseph fic. Alternitive universe blah blah. Continual switching. Changed personalities.. not aeris and jenova. No revivals. NO INTRODUCED CHARACTERS
1. One with boredom 'Seph'

Disclaimer: I do not own final fantasy 7 but I certainly wish I could have created it. Is there anything else I am supposed to put here? If there is then I will put that down as soon as I update with the next chapter.  
  
*Readers/critics I have ~~ for thoughts and they are also is put down two spaces sometimes. so you should be able to tell when the character is thinking (I hope!).  
  
*Chapters will be focused on either Sephiroth or Aeris and I will make it clear who it is by the chapter name and their name. If I don't put it down then they will be included in that chapter.  
  
  
  
If I Only Had a Chance  
  
  
  
~~I have waited for months now and she still does not notice me. Why would I care? And why would I risk everything for her? How can I explain this to myself whilst I am entranced in her angelic movements. Fate has destined me to love Aeris but are we meant to be? ~~  
  
The rain gloomed overhead of the giant research lab in Junon. This had awoken Sephiroth from his state of detachment from the world. Apparently Sephiroth had shifted unknowingly into a crouching position against the wall of his cell. He did not care much about his appearance for the scientists only cared about their studies on the Cetra race.  
  
Sephiroth was simply dressed in a black shirt and black pants. He believed that this would remove some of the attention away from him. Nevertheless people still gawked at him, writing down his every movement hoping to get some sort of superhuman sign. This never bothered Sephiroth for Hojo was constantly annoying him. He somehow made Sephiroth feel detached, unwanted, dispirited and hopeless just by speaking to him. Everyday in Sephiroth's life was very repetitive. to him at least but Hojo was always making knew discoveries about the Cetra race and what it has to with Sephiroth.  
  
The cold room Sephiroth was trapped inside day and night always seemed lifeless and boring, exactly as Hojo had wanted it to be. He wanted to drain all of Sephiroth's emotions, leaving just a body with a killer instinct mind not caring about anything. Sephiroth never knew why Hojo had wanted this.  
  
Sephiroth called his room a cell because to him it was not in one way different. He was surrounded by glass and Hojo's other 'specimens' were visible through the glass. They were also trapped, mistreated and drained of their very life so that Hojo can study them.  
  
Hopelessly in love Sephiroth stood up and stared towards Aeris' cell. His hands placed upon the walls of his glass cell made him feel somewhat closer to Aeris. The love he felt for her made everything disappear when he watched her. All his worries had seemed to vanish for just a moment, only to return to him with doubt of being with her. He never could explain to himself why he would love her from just looking her but he never had felt this way about someone before so assumed it was love.  
  
Sephiroth turned away from Aeris who was sleeping innocently. His thoughts raced around searching for answers. Sephiroth placed his hand upon his head and strained his mind into finding an answer for Hojo not allowing her to leave.  
  
"She doesn't seem to be worried or scared. So maybe she is allowed to go. But then why is she here?" Sephiroth said to himself.  
  
"How long will she be here? And exactly why do they need her?" Sephiroth said aloud knowing he wouldn't get any sort of reply.  
  
He sat there waiting for a sign he knew would never come and acceptance he knew he would never get. He thought how could Hojo do this to someone. He knew how hopeless this attempt at finding some sort of answer from Hojo.  
  
"I have been here for so long and nobody has even told me why? What is so special about me? What harm could I do if I knew what was happening?" Sephiroth shouted aloud.  
  
  
  
~~Maybe this has nothing to do with me? What if he is only interested in capturing my mother Jenova? She did escape from them. But that was years ago and she didn't even take me with her. Her powers were drained when he caught her. Is Hojo just using me as bait? If it was so then I will not allow her to return~~  
  
Sephiroth would have loved to curse Hojo for keeping him cramped here until he would agree to join Shinra's army. He sat there and thought deeply about his position in life. Over and over the he was distracted by the somehow tainted room of his. He redirected his thoughts towards Hojo and muttered something  
  
"Soon enough I will go insane" Sephiroth muttered to himself.  
  
  
  
~~Aeris how can I get you to notice me? Why don't I take up Hojo's offer and work for Shinra? Then to some extent I won't be embarrassed to speak with her. She just might even like me. But she wouldn't like me as I am now. I am such an idiot; I don't even know my own father. If I go then what will happen to her? Are they going to use her as a lab rat? Poking needles in her just to see her reaction. What if she dies? Then I would be to blame. I can't even protect the one I love the most~~  
  
Quiet abruptly tears began to emerge from Sephiroth's fiery green eyes. The tears doused the fire in his eyes leaving him with a dull green colour. His hair glistened in the moonlight and his eyes encased in tears looked as if they were bleeding stars. The despair filled up within him crushing his very dreams of peace, burning the very spirit inside him.  
  
Off in the distance Sephiroth had heard someone nearing him. Desperately Sephiroth tried to cover up his emotions before his visitor could see him. It was a hopeless attempt for he had not an ounce of time.  
  
  
  
~~If Hojo sees me it would be a disaster if Hojo sees me now. What would he do? I think Hojo would take one look at me and laugh just to insult more, making me feel even more depressed. Yeah, but what could he possibly say? Why do I deserve this? ~~  
  
Without a sound the glass cell disappeared and Hojo stood in front of Sephiroth. Hojo waited arousing an uncomfortable silence in Sephiroth. He stood there and watched him forcing Sephiroth to start the conversation. Hojo knew this eerie quiet presence of himself would somehow anger Sephiroth.  
  
"Hojo, what are you here for? You came here to kill me. Saving me the pleasure of committing suicide myself. I thought I would die if I had to speak with you once more." Sephiroth began.  
  
"I see that you are interested in the other 'specimen' Sephiroth. I will tell you know that this is not a breeding program. How could you be in love with that girl? Do not even try to hide it because I already know you inside out." Hojo replied successfully evading Sephiroth's question.  
  
Hojo laughed continuously at Sephiroth. Hoping to spark up something in Sephiroth that would force him to reveal his true feelings for her. It after a few seconds Hojo paused and walked closer to Sephiroth staring directly in his eyes spotting tears. Stunned that Sephiroth would cry Hojo took a few steps back and thought how to take advantage of his situation.  
  
"Dear Sephiroth you do know that love makes people inseparable but as you can see Aeris and you will always be. well you know. I'll just let you dwell on that thought. " Hojo flaunted  
  
Hojo exited the room slowly, celebrating his psychological victory over Sephiroth. Hojo closed the door, which made an echoing sound that filled Sephiroth's ears.  
  
"That was awfully quick. Leave it to Hojo to find out how to make you feel hopeless" Sephiroth mumbled.  
  
The glass cell rose up again trapping Sephiroth once more in the large room. He felt as though it was tainted because of Hojo's last words. Sephiroth felt as though his thoughts were crushing him into the ground and the only way to get rid of them is to give up.  
  
  
  
~~Why aren't Aeris and me together? How can you understand love? He is trying to ruin me and this time has he succeeded? My feelings don't matter to anyone so why should I care about myself? ~~  
  
Sephiroth had new reasons to haunt him in his dreams. Endlessly his subconscious mind displays forms of terror and despair in his sleep. The nightmares Sephiroth creates become worse by each passing day. His days were just as bad as his nightmares and for all he would know he didn't have a clue if he existed or if he was in hell.  
  
  
  
~~Fate. perhaps things happen to me because they are preparing me for something horrible that I must endure. Why do I think like this? And will I ever get the answers?~~  
  
Somehow Sephiroth's thoughts had comforted him. Feeling a little bit more relaxed Sephiroth looked out the window, gazing at the stars for he thought he could explain to himself why all of this was happening to him. Not once has he ever looked towards the stars for their comforting brightness.  
  
  
  
~~If it is true then what is to become of my future. I certainly would not dare to face it. What could it possibly be and is it that bad? Fate is inevitable so whatever it is will happen to me.~~  
  
  
  
A.N The story will eventually develop. most likely in the third chapter. Please just point out anything you like or hate. do not worry for I will back everything with one reason. it is my style. a very unique mistake intended to test the reader! Well read on if you prefer to.  
  
" Is love attained through trust and 'togetherness' or is it just that you love and never find out why." "See through the lies and distinguish the evils in the world."  
  
This is just poetry lines because I just want to warn you about my poetry style (do not worry because there will not be any in this story. well just a little!) 


	2. Within my mind 'Aeris'

~~Who is that guy and why is he still here after all this time? He was ever so weird. All day he would look at me as if he was staring into my soul. Am I transparent? ~~  
  
~~No point thinking about it in my head with Hojo constantly trying to pry it open and scoop out the contents~~  
  
Aeris was lying on the floor staring up at the ceiling searching within her self for some sort of answer. She never believed that she was exactly what Hojo had been telling her, an 'Ancient', a descendent of one of the people in Cetra race. Aeris had always disagreed with Hojo's assumptions because she believed that she was meant to be some sort of human test subject for Hojo to experiment with. Aeris had never known why Hojo had to go to the trouble of finding her and then capturing her himself.  
  
~~What is an ancient? And exactly what is the Cetra race? Hojo is just saying all this stuff and I can not keep up with what the hell he is trying to tell me. I do see that I am human so what makes me different from the rest of the world?~~  
  
Aeris had heard of what she believed were footsteps nearing her. Bracing herself Aeris sat upright and waited patiently for this person to come. Thoughts of what that person might do to her raced back and forth within her mind. The lingering presence of becoming a mutated person was what Aeris had feared most.  
  
Without any sound the glass cell was lifted. someone was present in the room. Aeris could distinctly spot a person in the reflection of the glass. it was Hojo.  
  
~~There he is my own nightmares summed up into a physical existence. How evil can a single being be? I shall eventually find out through him. Do I fear him or is it that I fear him because I would not like to have an existing friendly relationship with the same person who placed me here and kept my disappearance silent.~~  
  
Aeris rose from the floor and met Hojo's eyes. To Aeris his eyes looked as if they were devising some sort of plan. She removed her earplugs and walked right up to Hojo.  
  
~~He is distressed. Hojo, the one that is meant to be a harsh-hearted, insensitive, arrogant, indestructible scientist is faltering to handle stress. I see that sometimes even he can be 'human' in a way. Is there something driving him on? Some sort of goal he is aiming to attain some day. wait, Hojo having a dream. Am I going insane!~~  
  
"Dear Aeris. I sense a hint of sarachasim today," Hojo began. "Given up yet? Why don't you lead me to the Promised Land. It is merely for scientific research, nothing for you to be afraid of."  
  
"Alright! I shall lead you to this promised land you seek. and what is the promised land by the way?" Aeris questioned Hojo.  
  
"You can hide the truth extremely well Aeris. I shall commend you for your attempts shatter the plans to find the promised land but in the end it will be found. I will not have anything to do with it for fate shall see to it that you will discover the promised land and when you do." Hojo said with his usual final-conclusion type tone.  
  
"Yes one is able to rediscover one self after one has clarified that one is not who the think they are. Shortly after I must search within myself to find the true answers that I have been seeking of," Aeris said, implying that she did not care about anything of what Hojo previously assumed.  
  
~~What am I saying? I think Hojo might think I am losing it. He came seeking guidance and I have not an ounce to share for I haven't any. I can't figure out my own life so how could I lead some search for this specific promised land which I believe does not exist.~~  
  
"Aeris certainly you already know the facts so I will not bother anymore just wait and see exactly what happens during the rest of your life. I would hate to see such a young girl be so stubborn. Aeris for you would not want to live any longer once the event finishes. Remain the same and you shall collapse under the pressure," Hojo said hoping that he was not to direct with the information.  
  
~~What is he going on about? What is the event? From now on I should stay clear of Hojo's crazed conversation topics. I do not even understand why he converses with his 'specimens' as he calls it. This talk about the promised land and the Cetra has been an ongoing thing. Hojo is clinging to his outrageous assumptions like he knows completely everything. Is he just trying to convince me? He should just give up because I am not going to become insane.  
  
"I should definitely leave you to sleep for now. In the end you shall find out everything and will just have to accept it. if you can," Hojo said, ending the conversation.  
  
A.N Disregard my word usage if you would prefer to. I hope that someone likes this new style because I just want to express the character more because in my stories for they may on occasions take on a very different role to what people would believe they are like.  
  
*Reminder that I want more Sephiroth and Aeris fan fictions. oh and I always think my work is not that good so criticism is accepted because I want to know what is wrong.  
  
FINAL FANTASY 7 LIVES ON! 


	3. Is it but a dream? 'Seph'

*I am just describing Junon and the thoughts that are typed up are Seph's. Here you are at chapter three, which I believe has gone a bit off the track.  
  
The morning sun's glow dispersed little light among the crowded city of Junon. The city withheld enormous buildings towering up towards the sky, penetrating the clouds they seemed endless. Most of the people who worked at Junon came from other cities because off the endless job possibilities in Junon. The city had become the centre of attention for almost everything, which in turn has shadowed every other city.  
  
The sparkling blue-green sea was right in front of Junon generating its calm presence. During the evening the sea would reflect the moonlight and brighten up like some sort of nature's night light. The residents had always pointed the sea out to visitors, which automatically became entranced in its calm beauty.  
  
The city usually held parades sparking joyous feelings, which had always played a part in Junon's profits. There are always heaps of tourists at Junon because of its safety and beauty, forcing the people to overcome its greatness and become accustomed to it. Recently there have been more celebrations because of the new owner of 'Shinra Inc' Rufus. He owned most of the buildings so Rufus basically governed the city itself by buying everything out. No one cared because their city was becoming greater and more popular everyday.  
  
The synchronised beauty of this city was countered by the fact that there was a military base defending the city. Complaints were rare for nearly half of Junon's population is among the army ranks. For some reason plant life begun to flourish during the past three months. Most people say that it was Rufus for he became president of Shinra just four months looking to boost his people and army's moral.  
  
~~How is it that in a city like this resides a mind with intentions possible of creating plans of no meaning merely for 'scientific reasearch'. I shall despise Hojo forever for he is the one who has had me cooped up in different cities for all my life. Why is Hojo so attached to me? Certainly he would not become emotional if he were to release me.~~  
  
The faint light was barely enough to light the cell Sephiroth was contained in. The same thing day after day is apparently normal for Sephiroth. He created routines to maintain his sanity. What he did was limited to thoughts for Sephiroth had not one object in the plain cell of his. It never mattered because Sephiroth had discovered that he was a very imaginative person. or he thought he was for he had never actually met anyone besides Hojo who taught him and noted the various reactions that Sephiroth made.  
  
There was this one thing Sephiroth was intrigued by. he had always wanted to know what soldier is but had actually never spoke of it to Hojo, thinking that he would just laugh and say that a perfect human has a flaw is it possible.  
  
In the midst of Sephiroth's wondering a small circular burning white light appeared in front of Sephiroth's eyes. His mind was racing back and forth about what this could be.  
  
~~What is this thing and is it real. wait what if it is one of Hojo's tests. I should think carefully. Now I doubt Hojo could make fire burn without heat and some sort of fuel. Fire materia cannot be used unless it is casted on a target. I should just extinguish it before Hojo finds out what it is. I hope my hands do not burn that much.~~  
  
Sephiroth reached out to close of the oxygen feeding the fire. As he neared it colours circled him like a wind and restrained his arms and legs. Faster and faster they closed in around Sephiroth until they formed a ball around him making sure that he would not escape. Sephiroth had no idea what exactly was happening to him so he just sat there waiting for whatever it was to end. The 'ball' somehow just began to fall at an unthinkable rate. Sephiroth begun to think that he was finally being saved from Hojo.  
  
~~How is this thing even passing through objects? Finally I can express some sort of feeling of relief. What if I am still inside the cell and this is all but a dream. I should just hope that this actually frees me from Hojo. I know Hojo would have people to search for me. At long last I might experience freedom.~~  
  
The ball had begun to turn and spin and move in all different directions. Then it came to a sudden stop. The colours turned blue and then they just disappeared.  
  
Sephiroth was in a looked up and realised that he was in a cave. The interior of the cave was of a crystal blue colour. It had looked as if someone had altered cave to look like how it was. Sephiroth was now less shocked from before and checked to see if someone was there. He saw atop of an altar was that light again but much larger in size. The light had formed an outline of a body. Sephiroth took a few steps towards the light to take a closer look. A person had begun to materialise out of the light. It was a woman. She had white hair that was much longer than Sephiroth's and two enormous wings protruded out from her back. She was a slender woman and her eyes were the same mako green colour as Sephiroth. She wore an extremely long dress and in her outstretched hand was a picture.  
  
"Sephiroth please do not fear me. You have already forgotten who I am. I am your mother Jenova. Hojo took you away from me and never returned. I ask you just to believe me for I even have a picture of you. If you would only look at it," Jenova said in an echo-like voice.  
  
Sephiroth walked straight up to her and stared at the picture. It showed a young boy looking very similar to Sephiroth and a couple standing behind Sephiroth all smiling.  
  
"So Hojo never told me this and he is my own father. If you really are my mother I still have to be cautious so please understand that," Sephiroth replied.  
  
"Sephiroth I must tell you something. Hojo mutated my body and I cannot survive for much longer. If I were to stay alive I would need to switch bodies with an 'Ancient' because I for one cannot live in a normal human body. Please you must seek out an Ancient and return that person to me. I beg of you son for time and energy is not what I have much of left," Jenova informed Sephiroth.  
  
"I will try. mother. Then maybe we can make up for the lost time," Sephiroth said agreeing with Jenova's bidding.  
  
"Sephiroth! Take this on your search," Jenova said coughing slightly.  
  
In Jenova's outstretched palm a sword materialised. It was a silver sword with a red and brown handle. It was encrusted with several pieces of materia some of which Sephiroth did not know of. Its elegance was god like and it shone with the utmost beauty for it was nothing like Sephiroth had ever seen.  
  
"The sword. it has a name. 'Masamune'. When you return I shall tell you of whom I received it from. Take great care of it." Jenova said.  
  
Sephiroth slowly removed the sword from Jenova's hand and took one last look at Jenova then fled with not a single thought, which was disrupted by the lingering presence of actually having a mother.  
  
  
  
A.N PLEASE NOTE JENOVA is 37, HOJO is 38, SEPIHROTH is 15 and AERIS is 15 for the sake of this story  
  
I gave Sephiroth the masamune finally. 


End file.
